At times I don’t feel like my little heart can’t take it, other times I welcome the challenge, and half the time I’m just over-analyzing every single detail. I drive myself crazy. And if I drive myself crazy, I’m sure I drive others crazy too lol.
For those times that I falter, I force myself to put on my big girl panties and get the f**k over it. That is the only thing that I can do because it is what it is.
I had a general idea of what I was getting into but I dont think I truly understood. I met the love of my life…finally. He happens to have two kids with another woman. Ok, when you say it like that it doesnt sound so friendly. Lets re-phrase:
I met the love of my life and he has two beautiful children.
Ok that sounds a world better lol. So I knew the situation at hand and I appreciated his honesty when he told me this information. At the time, I thought to myself…”no big deal…im great with kids!”
HA! I got used to plans changing with a drop of a hat…I understand I share his attention with these two little lovebugs, I got used to the extra dishes, extra laundry, and extra time that we thought would just be me and him can suddenly change to me, him, and his & hers. I get it. The one thing that I got used too quickly was the love that was shown to me both by him and the kids. I feel lucky in that regard.
I am still learning how to fit in to this already made family. I am still trying to grasp the fact that I will never be the only woman in his life. There will always be another…and even though i’m at the top of the list, the list has more than one name on it.
Sometimes my big girl panties dont fit and I put up a fight…kicking and screaming. Once i’m talked off the ledge, I tell myself this: it is what it is.
Aww yeah – it is nice that you found the love of your life. If he truly is the one – then good for you for being able to compromise in certain things and caring about his needs as a father. I really do think that him being a father to his children is so important – it is so good for you to understand and encourage dad. Some of my friends don’t have a good relationship with their father and it’s so sad because my father always made me know I had a place to go and someone there to help pick of the pieces of my fragile and sometimes broken heart. You seem like a warm person – no wonder you are great with children! Good luck with everything
Thank you so much! I appreciate it, truly!